What is Anxiety, Really?

Anxiety; a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.

Enough said.

For me, this is a feeling of everything I do is not good enough. What my mom would call a, “worry wart.”

Of course, over time, undiagnosed my worrying thoughts eventually grew into panic attacks and breakdowns.

Still for a long time this still continued to go “undiagnosed” as I just thought I was, “stressed out.” Putting a label on something that little did I know ended up being, GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder).

Yes, its a real diagnosis.

Kinda like what it sounds a “generalized” anxiety disorder – meaning you have anxiety like most americans caused by many different things so we will bunch you all as one…

Unfortunately, its too late for me. It is learned. Its in my bones. I don’t know how to not be “me” – the way I am. The sad realization is that I will be on medication for the rest of my life 🙁

I have to say the worst part of it is though, is trying to find the right medication that works for “you”. This process sucks. Going from withdrawl to another as a result of switching meds can be pretty agonizing and this is spoken from a recovering addict.

Yes, you read right, I’m a recovering addict. I have been clean & drug-free for over 9 years. It’s still pretty crazy to think about that person I used to be…but it makes sense though, undiagnosed for so long time, my doctors told me that I was “self-medicating”…